Rich-Man's Chicken Kiev (Pheasant Parcel)

My mate Adam sometimes goes shooting with his Dad, so he has a fairly plentiful supply of free pheasant. He was kind enough to give me a breast recently so I thought I'd have a go at a recipe.

I had never made pheasant before, but I was aware that it has very little fat, being a game bird, so it needs a bit to be added in order to keep it nice and tender. Here, I did it in two ways - with a garlic and herb butter in the middle and a couple of rashers of streaky bacon round the outside. The result was most agreeable, Mr D'arcy.

Ingredients (for one):

• 1 x pheasant breast fillet
  
• 2 x rashers of streaky bacon
• Half a garlic clove
• 1 x pinch of fresh flat-leaf parsley and tarragon leaves, plus an extra parsley leaf to garnish
  
• 1 x reasonably sized knob of butter
• Salt and pepper

Method:

1. Clean the pheasant breast THOROUGHLY so that you know there are no stray bits of feather/other crap. Clean it like you cleaned your hands that time your mum walked in on you having a danger wank.
2. Chop the garlic and herbs as finely as you can, but make sure you only cut through each section of the bunch once so that you don't lose the flavour. Mix it with the butter.
   
3. Butterfly the pheasant breast, i.e. take a very sharp knife and cut it along the centre so that you can fold it out. Try to flatten it a bit - I used my hands to do this but I guess the proper way would be to use a rolling pin or a steak tenderiser.
4. Roll the garlic and herb butter into a sort of sausage shape that fits nicely in the middle of the butterflied pheasant breast and fold it over. Season it well, then wrap it in the bacon and then again, tightly, in cling film, making sure it's well covered. TIP: if you really desperately want to make sure that it stays tightly wrapped you can chuck it in the fridge for a while; however, I didn't bother and it seemed to turn out fine.
5. Get an oven-proof pan, add a bit of olive oil in it hot and put the pheasant parcel in the pan. It should sizzle vigorously in the pan - if it doesn't then take it out and put it back in when it's hotter. Brown it on all sides and then put it in the oven for about 15 minutes at 200 degrees.
6. Serve garnished with a large parsley leaf.
   

I served mine with mustard mash and strained cooking juices on the side. I liked it, but I can imagine someone finding that to be a bit too much fat on one plate. I think some cabbage would go nicely with this, or perhaps some nice mushrooms, cooked the Italian way with butter, garlic, white wine and a squeeze of lemon juice.

Summer sausage fun

Bangers and mash is usually thought of as a hearty winter warming dish, but as it's one of my favourites I thought I'd give it a bit of a makeover for the summer. It's lighter, more seasonal and a bit healthier as sweet potatoes don't need gallons of butter in order to mash well and taste good.

This recipe, as per usual, is nice and simple. The only tips I would really make for a real novice would be to check the seasoning, particularly in the sweet potatoes, and keep an eye on the temperature of the onions (and the amount of oil in the pan) to help them caramelise without burning. As with normal bangers and mash, it relies on two main things for good flavour - top quality sausages and a real gravy made with caramelised onions and good stock.

Ingredients:

• 4 good quality butcher's sausages
• 4 medium-large sweet potatoes, peeled and chopped
  
• 2 onions, cut into half moons
  
• 2 gloves of garlic, smashed and peeled
• About 400ml vegetable or chicken stock
• 200ml cider
• 4 thyme sprigs
• 4 rosemary sprigs
• A few handfuls of parsley
• 2 tbsps olive oil
• 2 tsps butter (optional)
• 2 tbsps Worcestershire sauce
  
• Salt and pepper
• 1 tbsp flour (optional)

Method:

1. Heat the oil to a medium-high heat in a pan. Add the garlic and herb sprigs and fry them for a few seconds until they're fragrant. Add the sausages, brown them on all sides, them remove them to a plate.
2. Add the onions and reduce the heat to a medium-low level. When they've started to turn transcluscent, lower the heat even more and cover the pan. Stir the onions occasionally and let them gently fry for 20-30 minutes or until they've caramelised.
3. Meanwhile, start the sweet potatoes off in lightly salted cold water and bring them to the boil from there, then simmer briskly until the potatoes are tender (about 15 minutes). When they slide off a knife, they are tender enough, and you should drain them to avoid letting them get soggy. Put them back on the ring for a minute on a very low heat to let the excess water in the pan evaporate.
   
4. Put the sausages back in, raise the heat and add a splash of cider to the pan., along with the flour if you're using it. Boil the cider until it's reduced by half, then add the stock. Bring the stock back to the boil and then let it simmer for about 15 minutes until it has reduced. Season to taste as you go along.
5. As a finishing touch for the potatoes, grab a bit of parsley and chop it up roughly using a very sharp knife, then mash it into the sweet potatoes.
   

Pig Destroyer

This pork chop represents a defining moment in my life - I finally got the crackling right on a chop as opposed to a big roasting cut. From now on, this is how you will cook pork chops, or I will spitroast you.

Ingredients (to serve four):

• 4 thick, well marbled, good quality pork chops from your butcher - no supermarket crap
• 6 large garlic cloves
• 600g new potatoes
• 2tsps English mustard
• 1 cabbage
• 400ml vegetable stock (I guess)
• Splash of Worcestershire sauce
• 2 tbsps plain flour
• 2 tbsps runny honey
• 4 tbsps cider vinegar
• 2 tbsps brown sugar
  
• 4 tbsps dried oregano
• Salt and freshly ground black pepper
• 250ml good cider (again, guessing)
  
• Drizzle of sunflower oil

Method:

1. Preheat the oven to 200 degrees celcius.
2. Scrape and wash the potatoes and put them in a saucepan with salted cold water.
3. Core the cabbage and cut it into quarters, then shred it as finely as you like. Finely chop two of the garlic cloves and mix them with the cabbage in a baking tin along with the honey, sugar, cider vinegar, seasoning and Worcestershire sauce. Add enough vegetable stock to just cover the cabbage, then cover the tin with foil and put it in the oven.
4. Meanwhile, prepare the pork chops. I'm assuming you've already got them out of the fridge at least 15 minutes in advance so that they can adjust to room temperature. Using a very sharp knife, cut through the layer of skin and fat on the outside (stopping just short of cutting into the flesh). Season each chop well on both sides with salt and pepper. Smash the remaining garlic cloves, discard the skin, and place one underneath each pork chop on a baking tray or roasting tin. Rub some oregano onto the top of the chops, pour a splash of Worcestershire sauce on each one and drizzle them with sunflower oil.
5. When the cabbage has been cooking for about 10 minutes, put the pork chops into the oven and raise the temperature to 220 degrees. After 15 minutes, lower the temperature to 190 degrees and roast for a further 20 minutes.
6. Get the potatoes boiling for about 10 minutes or until they slide off a sharp knife.
7. When the chops are done, put them on a plate to one side and put the roasting tin on the hob; leave the cabbage in the oven for now. Turn the hob on high so that the juices start bubbling. Add the flour into the juices and then deglaze it with the cider. Once the cider has reduced by half, add the vegetable stock and reduce it by about half. Strain the grindcore gravy into a suitably br00tal jug and spoon any scum off the surface.
8. To finish the potatoes, heat a little olive oil in a saucepan and add the cooked potatoes, along with a couple of teaspoons of mustard. Toss your spuds around until they're well covered.
   

Balls to the lot of you (lamb soutzoukakia)

I would like to begin this post by expressing my sincere apologies for the absence of music from my blog. I can appreciate the deep sense of loss you must feel at not being able to listen to Slayer whilst reading my recipes. However, the gadget I used no longer seems to be working! To make it up to you, here's a nice Greek recipe for the summer.

This was actually the first Greek thing I attempted to cook, back in the day. They're basically elongated lamb meatballs. It's quite an easy recipe which won't take longer than about 40 minutes, prep included. As you can see, I made quite a big portion for myself, so the ingredients to follow are designed to feed 4 people with relatively normal appetites.

Ingredients:

• 600g minced shoulder of lamb
• 3 good sized garlic cloves
• 1.5 - 2 onions, depending on the size
• Large glass of red wine
• 2 bay leaves
• 2 400g tins of chopped italian tomatoes
• 3 tbsp chopped fresh parsley
• 1 tbsp dried oregano
• 2 egg yolks, beaten
• Salt and freshly ground black pepper
• Plain flour, to sprinkle
• 2 tbsps olive oil

Method:

1. Heat the oil in a large pan at a medium-hot heat (about 4 on an electric hob).
   Thinly dice the onions, peel and finely chop the garlic and chop the parsley roughly (try to only do it once as you don't want to lose too much of the juices). Mix it all together in a bowl with the lamb, oregano, egg yolks and seasoning, using your hands. Make 12 roughly egg-sized soutzoukakia. It's important that you really get stuck in with your hands here as the warmth will help them to stick together.
2. Put your soutzoukakia on a plate and sprinkle them with flour. Make sure they're covered on all sides and gently put them into the pan. They should sizzle on contact - if they don't, remove them and wait for the pan to heat up a bit. Brown them well on all sides for a couple of minutes. NOTE: this is not exactly a complicated recipe, but there are a couple of things you want to be a bit careful of at this stage. Don't turn the soutzoukakia too often because (A) they won't brown as nicely, (B) they will take longer to brown and (C) you increase the risk of allowing them to break up and turn into Sloppy Joe's. When you do turn them, do so VERY carefully using a spatula and your other hand, or (better still) a pair of tongs.
3. Once this is done, remove them to a plate. Drain off the excess fat from the pan (there may be a fair bit from the mince) then return it to the heat and add the bay leaves. When it's fragrant, add the wine, bring it to the boil and let it reduce by half, then add the tinned tomatoes. Mash them up in the pan, add the soutzoukakia (again, carefully!) and bring it all to the boil. Cover and simmer for 20 minutes, turning the soutzoukakia once halfway through.
4. Serve with pureed or sauteed potatoes, boiled rice or pitta bread. Kali oreksi!

This recipe is dedicated to my old mate Hermes from Essex Uni and his mum who made some awesome soutzoukakia when I came to visit them in Greece!

Honey and mustard pork chops with gratin dauphinoise and braised red cabbage

Pigs are apparently very intelligent animals. I like to think of this as brain food. In fact, pigs have outperformed young children on some tests. Hmm...

Don't be put off by the lengthy marinade involved in this recipe; it takes about a minute to put the ingredients together, and then you just leave it in the fridge overnight while you get on with something else. For example, you could spend some quality time with your family, who were getting worried about the amount of time you were spending in the kitchen or locked in your bedroom looking at my blog.

Marinade ingredients:

• 4 good quality pork chops
• 3 garlic cloves
• 3-4 tsbps wholegrain mustard
• 6 tbsps clear runny honey
• 2 tbsps Worcestershire sauce
• Salt and freshly ground black pepper

Gratin ingredients:

• 1kg Desiree potatoes
• 250ml milk (guessing here!)
• 250ml double cream
• 1 nutmeg
• 100g mature cheddar
• Salt and freshly ground black pepper

Cabbage ingredients:

• 2 tbsps olive oil
• 2 tbsps runny honey
• 250ml vegetable stock
• 1 red cabbage
• 2 tbsps muscovado sugar
• 2 tbsps Worcestershire sauce

Method:

1. Mix the marinade ingredients together in a reasonably sized bowl. Put the pork chops in and turn them well to coat them all over. Cover the bowl with cling film and leave it in the fridge overnight.
2. Get the pork chops out of the fridge about 15 minutes before you want to cook them, as per usual. Preheat the oven to 180 degrees.
3. Peel and wash the potatoes, then slice them thinly (using a mandolin if you have one).
4. Put the milk and cream into a bowl, bring the mixture to the boil and simmer it until it's mixed together and has a reasonably thick consistency. Grate the nutmeg into the mixture and mix it well.
5. Arrange a layer of the potatoes on the bottom of a roasting tin. Season them well, then pour a little of the creamy sauce over them. Add another layer, season, add sauce and repeat until all of the potatoes are used up. Don't completely smother the potatoes in the sauce or they won't go crispy on top. Grate the cheddar cheese over them and then put them in the oven for about an hour and a half, then turn the heat up to 210 and cook for another half hour.
6. Wash the cabbage, core it and slide it thinly. Put it in a baking tray and mix in the remaining ingredients. Cover the tray with tin foil and put it in the oven for about 45 minutes.
7. To cook the pork chops, heat some olive oil in a couple of large pans on a medium-hot heat. Add the pork chops, making sure they sizzle vigorously on contact, and cook them for about 5 minutes on each side until they're cooked through, basting them with the marinade occasionally.

Baked salmon fillet with crushed new potatoes and green beans

I've been getting more into fish lately. But not in a dodgy "Jerry Springer - Too Hot for TV!" kind of way.

Salmon is very versatile and awesome in general. This recipe is fairly healthy, particularly if you omit the butter on the potatoes.

Ingredients:

• 4 salmon fillets
• Salt and freshly ground black pepper
• A good handful of fresh dill
• 4 garlic cloves
• 4 slices of lemon
• 4 small handfuls of crushed new potatoes
• A couple of handfuls of green beans
• Olive oil
• Extra virgin olive oil (yes they are different!)
• A couple of knobs of butter

Method:

1. Preheat the oven to 200 degrees.
2. Thoroughly wash the new potatoes and boil them for about 15 minutes. Add the green beans in for the last 2-3 minutes of cooking.
3. Meanwhile, put each salmon fillet on enough tin foil to wrap around them. Using a sharp knife, cut about three slits into the skin of the salmon. This will allow the seasoning to enter the flesh and let the fillet cook more evenly. Season them with the salt, pepper and a scattering of dill. Peel and smash the garlic cloves and put each one, along with a lemon slice, on top of each salmon fillet. Drizzle them with the normal olive oil and put them in the oven for about 12 minutes.
4. When the potatoes and beans are tender, drain them well and lightly crush the potatoes with a fork. Add a knob of butter or two to each portion and serve a salmon fillet on top. Drizzle with extra virgin olive oil and serve.

Peppered lamb steak with mustard-glazed carrots and new potatoes

My flatmate is a Green Party councillor. Unsurprisingly, he's a vegetarian. He insists on referring to meat as "carcass" as if it's going to gross me out and put me off eating it. This doesn't really work, and as I tucked into my nice medium rare lamb steak, I told him that I could almost hear it screaming.

This steak of new spring lamb was absolutely beautiful. I don't say that to big myself up; rather, the quality of the meat took care of itself. I also used new potatoes as they're particularly good at this time of year, and I glazed them in the way that my mate Andy showed me. I can't be bothered to estimate all the quantities here so this is just how I did it for myself.

Ingredients:

• 1 lamb steak
• 2-3 large garlic cloves
• 1 tsp English mustard
• 1 tbsp red wine vinegar
• Freshly ground sea salt
• About 1 tbsp black peppercorns
• 1 tbsp chopped fresh mint
• 1 large carrot
• 3-4 new potatoes (depending on the size), unpeeled but thoroughly washed
• 1 tbsp olive oil
• A knob or two of butter
• 1 bay leaf

Method:

1. Get your lamb steak out about 15 minutes before you want to cook it so that it can adjust to room temperature and cook evenly without shocking. In the meantime, put your washed new potatoes into a saucepan full of cold salted water, cutting them in half if necessary for size reasons, and peel and slice the carrots.
2. Rub the mint all over both sides of the lamb steak. Using a pestle and mortar, crack the black peppercorns up; if you don't have one to hand, use a chopping board and a wooden spatula and smash them with your hand. Season the steak well on both sides with salt and black pepper. Smash and peel the garlic clove with a knife.
3. Boil the potatoes for about 10-15 minutes, checking that they're tender with a knife. Add the carrots in for the last 2 minutes of cooking time.
4. Meanwhile, heat the olive oil in a frying pan on a fairly high heat. Add the smashed garlic clove and the bay leaf. When the oil is obviously hot, add the lamb steak. Note: steaks aren't all that difficult to cook; the main thing is to avoid the temptation to keep turning them over. You also want them to sizzle vigorously - if this doesn't happen the second they hit the pan, take them out and wait for the oil to heat up a but more. Fry the steak on one side for about 4 minutes, then turn it over and fry it on the other side. After 2 minutes, add the butter to the pan, baste it over with a teaspoon when it starts frothing, and fry it for another two minutes.
5. Remove the steak to a plate for 1-2 minutes, just to let it rest and relax while you finish the potatoes and carrots. They should be done by this point, so put them in the pan where the steak was. Add a splash of red wine vinegar to deglaze it, then add the mustard. Cook for a minute or two until the vegetables are all nicely covered in the mustard and pan juices, then serve with the lamb steak.